For the last two days we have enjoyed the perfect hospitality of Michi and Toi in his German Guesthouse “Green Oasis” in Chang-Mai. While Tobias enjoyed German Bratwurst and potato salad and was quite absorbed by the delicious food, Denise and Alex, being Vegetarians, had more time to follow the discussion of some guests.

While you cannot turn around in Thailand without seeing the King’s picture (on almost every wall, in every Thai living room and on every bank note) you find yourself confronted with various private kings holding court in Chiang-Mai, Northern Thailand. Kings from Germany. Kings who how came with great hopes. Kings who know that a blow job should not be performed after “she” had some chili for dinner.

Many of them came here to find an easier life; a life without German tax-lords, a life with a warmer climate… A life without any hardship in a world where women understand the true needs of a real German man. However, after having found a young Thai lady which is quite different from all the other street girls and truly loves you (and not your German money), with time they all somehow become slightly more realistic about their paradise-like host country. We heard sentences like “ …the Thai woman priority list is as follows: Money > Buddha > King > …. > The Dog > the Dog’s flees > the “farang” husband” or “You cannot expect love, but I guess she somehow likes me!” <o:p></o:p>

It seems that without money, you immediately become a “persona non grata” and must leave the country (without your young wife and most certainly without the house you have paid for).<o:p></o:p>

We only can warn everybody: whatever you don’t get in your home country will not necessarily been thrown at you in Thailand. We have experienced the Thais as very polite and helpful; however, only too often we get upset about the “yes-yes”-culture: Most of them don’t understand much English, but will always show signs of understanding you up to perfection. It is about not losing your face. This especially can get difficult when in a car repair shop. Tobias: “Can you hear this whistle-like sound coming from the Turbo? Do you think it is a damaged valve? Can you fix it?” Mechanic: “Yes, no ploblem, no ploblem!” Great,we think and when we are just about to take a seat in the customer lounge, the mechanic will follow up asking “Your car, is Toyota?” This is a bit upsetting, since we find ourselves in a Toyota dealership. The next question by the same man will always be “What is ploblem?”

Ps: The mentioned problem with the Turbo has not yet been fixed. However, they fixed the exhaust pipe without Tobias asking them to do that. “No ploblem, no ploblem!”